


Unwarranted Affections

by prettycheese21



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Bad Flirting, F/F, Flirting, Humor, Secret Marriage, Secret Relationship, and also very unobservant, request, the Avengers are bad at flirting lol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-23
Updated: 2016-02-23
Packaged: 2018-05-22 17:59:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,066
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6089296
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/prettycheese21/pseuds/prettycheese21
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Natasha and (Name) have been married for years. And the other Avengers have no idea.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Unwarranted Affections

**Author's Note:**

> Request: "can you do one where Natasha and the reader are married, but no one knows not even Clint or fury so the guys on the team keep flirting with you to try and win your affection completely unaware that your a lesbian and married to Natasha until all the flirting gets to her and she snaps and blurts out that your married to each other." - fieldmark346
> 
> So sorry this took so long! I meant to get it done before the end of my winter break, but that didn't happen. And then school got SUPER busy and I didn't have the time or motivation to write. I hope this is close to what you wanted.
> 
> Anyway, enjoy! :)

   "On your left!" (Name) shouted at Steve as she vaulted over the hood of a nearby car and delivering a swift kick to one of the man about to jump him. She landed on her feet, letting out a sigh of annoyance. "God, who the hell is stupid enough to try and attack Captain America?"

   A loud bang came from behind her, startling her as she brought her hands up to cover her head protectively. "About as stupid as the one who tried to attack you," Tony's voice came through the comm, becoming a red streak as he flew off in the opposite direction.

   "Thanks, Tony," (Name) stated as she and Steve pressed back to back, taking out bad guy after bad guy as they moved in sync.

   "Anytime, sweet cheeks." She could practically hear the wink in his voice. "You doing anything after this?"

   A groan escaped her as she punched Bad Guy #7 in the nose, feeling a smug sort of satisfaction when she heard it crack. "Are we really doing this again?"

   "Want to grab dinner when this is done?" He persisted, ignoring her question.

   "No, I don't, actually." A kick to the chest of Bad Guy #8 sent him sprawling backward.

   "Why not?" Tony whined. "You got plans already?"

   "Yes, I do. And no I'm not going to tell you because it's none of your business." (Name)'s fist sailed into Bad Guy #9's jaw, more forceful than was necessary due to her annoyance, causing him to crumple to the concrete.

   "I'll sway you eventually. All the pretty ones fall for me eventually."

_Yeah, well, not all the 'pretty ones' are lesbians_ , she thought to herself.

*****  
   "Tony was flirting with you again," Natasha commented later that night in their shared apartment, her nimble hands massaging (Name)'s shoulders.

   "I know. It's annoying," (Name) frowned as she leaned into her touch. "I don't get why he won't stop."

   "Have you seen yourself? You're gorgeous," she smirked, "And Tony's harmless. I think this whole thing is kind of funny, actually."  
  
   "It's irritating is what it is."  
  
   "Give it some time. He'll stop eventually. Even a dog gets tired of chasing its own tail," Natasha told her. "Now let's go to bed. I'm exhausted."

   "Yeah, okay." (Name) replied with a yawn, leaning over to give her wife a kiss on the lips before standing up to follow her to bed.

*****  
   Things had been quiet for a few days after that minor crisis. There was a mission to get some intel but that had been easy, ending with no injuries on the SHIELD side of things. About the fourth day though things took another interestingly annoying turn.

   (Name) had been sparring with Clint, refining her hand to hand combat skills. Everything had been going as it should, with (Name) kicking Clint's ass every other round. The pattern continued as (Name) ducked down to avoid a punch, shooting her leg out to sweep Clint's out from under him. As he feel onto his back, she climbed on top of him. She pinned his arms above his head as she sat on his chest, preventing him from getting up.

   Clint didn't even try to get up, only smiled that idiotic grin as he said, "You know, I kind of like this position."

   (Name) let out a chuckle, "Are you kidding me? Come on, Clint. Focus. How do you get out of this?"

   "Well, if by 'this' you mean being straddled by a hot chick then I don't think I want to get out of 'this'."

   "Here, let me do it for you." With that, she stood up, turned around, and walked out of the gym.

   "Hey, come on, (Name)! I was joking!" Clint shouted in protest at her retreating form, trying to get her to come back. She didn't.

*****  
   "He said that?" Natasha snorted as they ate their dinner, which was takeout (as it usually was). "God, he's such a dork."

   "How are you not mad?" (Name) asked incredulously. "This is the second of our teammates to flirt with your wife. Your _wife_."

   "But it's not like they know you're my wife," she shrugged, "We never told anybody. Though I am surprised they haven't figured out we're together yet. It has been two years."

   "Maybe we should tell them. Like you said, it's been two years. If something were to happen, it would have happened by now. And, Fury has protective programs in place for spouses-"

   "No," Natasha said firmly. "(Name), we've been over this. I don't trust the new SHIELD enough with this kind of information. Even government agencies like these are bound to have rats and I'm not putting you at risk. I won't let you be used against me."

   (Name) sighed. "I understand why you don't want to, I just- I almost feel like you're hiding me. I know. It's girly, it's weird, I just... I don't know."

   Natasha's face softened. She sat up and leaned forward, bringing herself closer to (Name). "Hey. I love you. Those are words I don't use often and mean them. You are my wife. I am not hiding you, or us. I'm not hiding. I'm merely protecting."

   "Sure feels an awful lot like hiding," (Name) mumbled as she got up to throw her container away, leaving Natasha to her thoughts.

*****  
   The next day marked a slow day in the life of being an Avenger. Still peeved at Natasha, (Name) had holed up in the break room to avoid seeing her (since she never stepped foot in there). Her pen scribbled across the papers, filling out report after report as she gave her accounts of the various missions she'd been on that month.

   Her focused silence was interrupted by the boisterous voice of a very familiar Asgardian. "Hello, (Name)," he greeted as he quickly took a seat across from her. "How are you on this fine day?"

   Giving a quick glance up, followed by a smile, she answered, "Fine. And yours?"

   "It is going quite well," Thor responded, giving her a bright smile of his own. He caught sight of the papers she was writing. "What is that you're writing?"

   She shrugged. "Just some reports Fury wants filed. With last week's crisis, I got behind when I was already behind, so now I'm playing catch up."

   "What is 'catch up'?" He asked, looking confused.

   (Name) chuckled as she signed the bottom of the incident report, finishing it. "It's just an expression. It means I'm trying to finish all the work I was supposed to have done already."

   "Ah, yes, I see." They fell into silence as she grabbed yet another form and began to furiously write about the Calcutta mission. Now _that_ was a mess. After about five minutes of quiet, he spoke again. "You are a talented fighter, do you know that?"

   "Yes, I've been told that many a times," she replied distractedly as she continued to write.

   "Really, (Name). Should you wish to go to Asgard, you would rank among the best of our warriors." Thor sounded so serious as he spoke, as if someone were trying to argue otherwise.

   (Name) stopped writing and looked at Thor. That's when she noticed the glint in his eyes. A familiar one. Oh god, he was flirting with her. And he absolutely _sucked_ at it. Raising an eyebrow as she awkwardly responded, "Ok..." Clearing her throat, she stood up, "I'm going to drop these reports off. This was a good talk. I'll- uh- I'll talk to you later, okay?"

   "Until later, (Name)."

   With that, (Name) walked out of the room, utterly befuddled. What the hell was that?

*****  
   "How was your day? I didn't see you much," Natasha remarked as they walked into the apartment after the work day.

   "It was alright," (Name) responded as she let her bag drop to the floor and shed her coat. "A little weird, but alright."

   "Why a little weird?" Natasha asked as she went to the kitchen for a drink.

   "Well, besides doing pointless paperwork all day on the clusterfucks that were my missions, I'm pretty sure Thor tried to flirt with me," (Name) said as she took the bottle of beer that Natasha had held out to her. "Key word: _tried_."

   She let out a dry laugh. "You're kidding."

   "I wish I was." She shook her head, opening her drink and taking a sip. "It was kind of weird. All he did was compliment my fighting skills."

   Raising an eyebrow, she asked, "Are you sure he wasn't just complimenting you?"

   She turned to look at her wife, a deadpanned look on her face. "Nat, I've mastered the art of flirtation. I know how to flirt as well as what it looks like, and Thor sure as hell was attempting to flirt with me."

   Natasha lifted her hands in a placating manner. "Okay. I was just making sure." When she noticed (Name)'s stressed out look, she asked, "Are you still worried about the whole flirting thing? (Name), it's all harmless. Unless Steve or Bruce starts flirting with you, then I'd be a bit worried."

   "Not helping, Nat," she grumbled as she crossed her arms over her chest.

   "All I'm saying is, you're hot. And guys like to flirt with hot girls. It's as simple as that. Do you see me freaking out about it?" She wrapped an arm around (Name), "Look, unless they start sending flowers or something, I'm not going to worry. I know you're not going to do anything. I know you're mine because I'm yours." Giving her head a kiss, she ended with, "Okay?"

   "Yeah, okay," she smiled up at her wife.

*****  
   (Name) heard angry muttering as she walked down the hallway at Avengers HQ. Confused, she stopped and turned around to head to the source of the voice. She determined it to be coming from one of the nearby offices. She peered into the room to see Steve looking frustrated with the printer in front of him, angrily pressing buttons every so often as he tried to get it to work.

   "Having some issues there, Steve?" she asked as she entered the room.

   He let out sigh as he pressed yet another button in a vain attempt to make it work. "This stupid printer won't work."

   "Yeah, the printers never work. That's why we use this thing called email," (Name) jabbed playfully as she nudged him aside to examine the printer, hoping to figure out the problem. "Why are you printing something anyway?"

   "I wanted to see some old documents and the files weren't emailing right. One of the other agents suggested I try printing them instead, but look how well that turned out."

   She chuckled as she pressed a couple buttons, giving a triumphant, "Aha!" as the printer started to work. "There you go. It should take a few minutes for the papers to print out, but you're all set."

   "Thanks." Steve gave her a smile, to which she nodded and turned to leave. His face briefly reflected an internal battle with himself before he said, "Wait, (Name), I have a question I wanted to ask you."

   Stopping in the doorway, she turned around to face him. "Yes?"

   "You- uh- you doing anything Friday night?" he asked shyly, putting his hands in the pockets of his leather jacket.

   (Name) could tell by the sudden change in his demeanor what his intentions were. He was asking her out. Great. How many was that now? Five out of six? She had to come up with an excuse and quick. She didn't want to bruise his ego but she also didn't want to up and tell Steve about her and Natasha. "Uh, sorry, I got plans with Natasha. It's a girl's night out."

   "Oh, okay. Another time then?"

   "Yeah, another time," she said with a honey sweet smile, lying through her teeth.

*****  
   "We have to tell them, Nat," (Name) stated as she walked into the apartment later that night.

   Natasha let out a sigh from where she sat reading on the couch. "We've been over this, (Name)."

   "I know we have, but Steve tried to ask me out today and this has got to stop," she explained, sitting down to her.

   "What?" Natasha stopped reading, closing the book and looking straight at (Name). "Steve asked you out?"

   "He tried to. I came up with a crappy excuse before he could the question out."

   "What'd you tell him?" she asked curiously, now entirely focused on the conversation.

   "That you and I were having a girl's night."

   "So, not a total lie then, huh?" Natasha smirked, trying to make her wife feel just a little bit better. It didn't work.

   "Nat, this is serious. We have to tell them," she stated firmly, giving Natasha her most serious look. "These people are our friends. We can trust them."

   Natasha thought about it for a moment, her face blank and virtually unreadable. A few minutes later she let out a relenting sigh. "Give it a day. I need some time to think about. We'll talk more about it tomorrow, okay?"

   "Fine," she huffed, "But one day and that's it." The sooner this was all out in the open, the better.

*****  
   The next day had gone by without incident. It seemed the world's criminals had gone on a short vacation, as it had been nearly a week since any major incidents had occurred. After the usual 8 hours of paperwork, meetings, and training, the evening was theirs to do as they pleased. It was then that Tony came up with the idea of having a team movie night. Everyone agreed, seeing as they rarely had time to hang out as merely friends.

   (Name) and Natasha had completely forgotten about their talk the night before, or chose to forget rather. It was a mutual agreement reached on the ride over where they decided to forgo any major decision-making until the next day. All they wanted was to have a good time, something they rarely ever got to do.

   This didn't last very long. At the end of the first movie, (Name) was elected (or rather forced) to go refresh everyone's snacks and beverages. Standing up from her spot on the couch next to Natasha, she said, "If I'm supposed to get snacks _and_ drinks for all of you, I'm going to need some help carrying it back in here."

   "I'll help," Bruce stated as he, too, stood. They each grabbed two bowls, which had contained some type of popcorn or chip, and walked into the kitchen. It was silent for the first five minutes as they both filled the went to work on filling the chip bowls. As (Name) reached into the cabinet for another package of popcorn, she heard Bruce speak. "Hey, I've been wondering about something."

   "About what?" she asked absent-mindedly as she put the unpopped bag of popcorn into the microwave, hitting the designated 'POPCORN' button to start the cycle.

   "Are you seeing anyone?" The question was so nonchalant that (Name) didn't register it right away.

   But, when she did, it was the straw that broke the camel's back. "You have _got_ to be kidding me." She turned on her heel and stormed into the living room, leaving a confused Bruce to follow behind her in search of an explanation. Everyone's head perked up at (Name)'s sudden entrance, "This has got to stop."

   "What does?" Steve questioned, genuinely puzzled.

   "This whole flirting thing you're all doing!" she exclaimed, frustrated with this whole situation. "As flattering as it is that you all find me attractive, I'm seeing someone and she and I aren't going to be breaking up anytime soon."

   "Wait, _she_? You're a lesbian?" Clint gaped at her, shocked by the sudden revelation that had been revealed.

   "Yeah, I like girls. Moving on-"

   "Never mind the fact that she's a lesbian. What about the fact that she has a girlfriend we don't know about," Tony was practically giddy at the juicy information being bestowed upon him, "Who is this mystery girl? Do we know her?"

   "Uh-"

   "Hey, enough," Natasha said as she came to stand next to (Name), an arm coming to wrap itself around her waist. "If my wife says to stop, you stop. Otherwise, I'll make you stop."

   "Wait- did you just your _wife_?!" Clint was even more befuddled than he had been a moment ago.

   "Yeah, did you?" (Name) asked Natasha, confused by the woman's sudden change of heart. Mere days ago she'd been adamant about keeping their marriage under wraps, and now she was flaunting it out in the open?

   "Okay, would one of you mind explaining what's going on here?" Steve jumped in, taking control of the situation.

   "(Name) and I are married," Natasha stated as if it were no big deal.

   "And how long has that been going on?"

   "We got married two years ago, after the whole Manhattan incident. After nearly dying by the hands of aliens, we figured why wait." She took (Name)'s hand and gave it a squeeze. "We didn't tell you because we... I thought it was a bad idea for people to know. The risk of our enemies using it against us was too big. And after SHIELD fell, I became even more for keeping it a secret. I kept thinking about what could have happened if the fact that we were married got out to our enemies. Mostly mine, but you never know..."

   "So you two have been married for two years and we never knew about it until now?" Steve summarized, obviously still confused and shocked at how he'd missed something that should have been fairly obvious.

   "Yeah, basically," (Name) answered.

   There was a moment of silence as the rest of the team absorbed this. The quiet only lasted a few more moments before Thor's joyous voice burst out into the air, "Congratulations ladies Natasha and (Name). You two do make a lovely couple. I wish you both many joys."

   (Name) laughed, happy that this weight had been lifted off of her chest. It was nice to be able to be open, especially with the people she'd come to know as friends. "Thanks, Thor."

   A moment of comfortable silence, and then, "Is no one going to talk about the fact that we all flirted with a lesbian?" Tony commented, naturally.

   "Shut up, Tony," (Name) and Natasha stated in perfect unison.

**Author's Note:**

> Like it? Want more?  
> Let me know by leaving a kudos or a comment!  
> Want to request something of your own?  
> You can do that here in the comments or you can go to my Tumblr page (@notsoobviousfangirl) and request there. Just note requests will take time because of busy schedule with school and such.
> 
> Thanks for the read :)


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